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Why Men’s Work IS Necessary for a Feminist Future.
An Interview with
Daniel and I met on Threads back in January.
Then we met up in person when I was in San Jose (Cali)…and found our work to be fantastically complimentary and synergistic.
And…since the “hot” topic is (drum roll) MEN (yet again🤯) and their “lack of females that will connect with them…causing them loneliness”…well it seemed fitting to bring Daniel in this week.
To have a frank conversation with a man who is committed to doing the work I and so many women are tired of asking for men to do.
He has and is waking up to patriarchy’s dire disease it inflicts on men, asking women how he can do more — and holding men’s circles for other men to do this as well.
1000000% YEA!
Daniel and I are conversating about what we will talk about — such as why it is so difficult for men to allow themselves to name “Patriarchy” as that which harms them, too.
We will get into how women can stop doing the emotional labor for men to wake up (because, yes many still are, even me right…damn that conditioning runs deep) — what a man that gets it really thinks men need right now and so much more.
And…I just have to say I had a BIG aha when listening to his latest interview that we will dive into more with him.
It has something to do with what men REALLY want connection to — and it is not women…so please come and listen in or catch the replay!
What do you think men are really longing to connect with/to?
Along that note…let me introduce this week’s release.
I took another break from our Season 1.
Partly cause I’ve been in nomad mode and enjoying life.
Partly cause I’ve been nailing down the tech I needed to ensure I didn’t lose another video into the void.
Partly cause this topic — male loneliness — really gets under my skin. Can you tell?!
Not because, as I said last week, I don’t believe men are in pain.
I do believe they are.
Women are pulling away at record rates (which is absolutely needed!).
In that void, men for the first time maybe ever are having to sit with themselves, with how lonely they are (which for a great majority of women, we have felt that WHILE IN relationship to men) — and no one is telling them what is really going on.
Instead they are being sold lieds.
By the Red Pill, Alpha Bro, Macho Male movement.
But also by men who say they “champion women.”
They are being told women are being superficial. Too Choosey. Too Needy.
That women are withholding connection because of A, B or C.
That women are now enacting a reverse doulbe standard (i.e. in regards to who pays on the date…stay tune for a sepearte reaction video to this with Gerda Lerner to back me up!)
In one word: CODDLED.
Men are being entitled and coddled to keep staying ignorant, small and blind.
Told they don’t have to do the work to dig deep, peel away their shadows and work on themselves and their internalized patriarchal misogyny that is keeping them lonely.
It is not even being hinted at that they might want to stop and actually ASK and then LISTEN to the women speaking out about this.
No, these male influencers just keep spoutting more cuck-holding BS that in one way or another avoids the big P word: Patriarchy.
Patrarichy that touts a version of masculinity that is fragile, broken and isolating men at record numbers as more young men listen to these Red Pill Alpha bros tell them “women are to blame for your lack in the world.”
These men, unfortunately, by listening to any of the main stream men out there right now (red pilled or not) — are diving deeper and deeper into the abyss of Patriarchy, being used and abused by a System they will die in despair to protect. Perhaps unknowningly by some of them.
While women continue to do the emotional labor of throwing the lifeline that will save them…they ignore it while chocking on the water of their internalized hate towards not just women — but themselves that Patriarchy has caused them to have.
What is more ironic and disasterous than this?
Yes — that sure is a damn freaking lonely and painful place to be.
When you are sold a falsehood that won’t solve or heal your pain.
Just so others can benefit financially and energetically off of men staying angry, hateful and lonely.
Let’s get real: yelling at women, getting frustrated at them, blaming them for not continuing the status quo? Well that won’t work. Not anymore.
We are seeing THE major shift in women’s circles these last months as more women wake up and say: No more. We get what’s happening and we are done being the emotional punching bag for men.
Said another way:
Men who should be able to name the ROOT cause of this issue…refuse to do so, for whatever reason.
In that black hole of refusing to name the Root Cause — they are doing
MORE HARM THAN GOOD with their responses to this issue.
IMHO, these men should absolutely lose business from the females who follow them if they are unwilling to name PATRIARCHY as the root cause of men’s pain.
AND women need to put the pressure on them that these type of messages are not acceptable. Not in the least.
As you will see in this weeks video — messages like this one DO NOTHING to help either side.
At best, Matthew Hussey throws oil on a burning fire.
At worst, and I land in this category, he is gaslighting all of us with his response. Especially women…whom he supposedly is “the champion of.”
(Every time I watch this video I want to throw my phone, shake off the eeky vibes and scream at him in frustration…which I do in this video response.)
Once again he and men like Scott Galloway leave women to do the emotional labor of NAMING THE PROBLEM.
Then turn around and shame, belitte, and dimiss us by their continual refusal to acknowledge Patriarchy as the problem.
We will never solve the dating issues, the gender equality issues, the debate of “who should pay”, nor the lack of"connection” issues men are crying about if men do not:
1. Stop, drop and listen
2. Look deeper than this entire issue being about women getting some financial legs while men fall behind financially (in the System of Patriarchy, this is so far from equality y’all),
3. Call it a day by telling women they are being superficial, too choosey and creating a reverse double standard (yes, Matthew in these short clips does just this. But in his entire video here, it is even worse) INSTEAD of digging deep into the System of Patriarchy and all the issues it creates. In ALL of us. For ALL of us.
If you are like me and SEE that we need a different approach, I encourage you to
1. Tune into today to this Response vid to Matthew Hussey.
2. Join us LIVE on Friday for our conversation with Daniel to hear from a brave soul doing the work.
3. Watch (or continue and/or rewatch) Season 1 here so you start to piece together HOW we got into this mess, what is really to blame (the Ideology and thus System of Patriarchy) and start to see a way forward out of this like I am doing as I study this work.
And I’m curious, really curious…how do you feel when you watch these clips from Matthew? Leave me your full unsensorted comments and thoughts.
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